In the last few days, a contentious discussion has been going on in some of Kerala’s social media circles – whether having sexual arousal or feelings towards children is justified or ‘normal’, if no act is committed and the child is not harmed. The issue emerged after a prominent activist was accused of sexually abusing children by various people on social media. No victim or family has filed an official complaint and an FIR has not been filed against him. Though many distanced themselves from him, several people came to his defence, claiming there was an element of Islamophobia in the attacks against the activist. However, it is apparently this same group of people who had, a couple of years back, defended a person who said he felt sexual attraction towards a child and posted comments.
A section of people started circulating screenshots of these comments from years ago - which show 'justifications' for sexual attraction towards children from adults. Prominent among them is a screenshot in which a man says, “In my opinion all kinds of sexual feelings are natural. It is unnatural when you expect me to engage in sex according to your fantasy. I feel lust towards a girl in class 5 whom I see every day. I feel a lot of love which cannot be explained. I give her chocolates every day. I enjoy her love. These [feelings] are quite natural.”
These comments had found support from ‘freethinkers’ then, and the screenshots have once again led to a discussion on paedophilia. One of the questions was whether normalising these thoughts would glorify and promote child sexual abuse.
It is important to understand that experiencing sexual or romantic attraction or feelings, or arousal towards children, in an adult, cannot be equated with having sexualities like homosexuality or heterosexuality. Simply put, this is because only adults can give informed and enthusiastic consent to sex, explains Dr Ujjwal Nene, a sexual health consultant based in Pune. “Children cannot give consent to sex, so the act of having sex with children is not only unethical but illegal all over the world,” she says.
According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM) published by the American Psychiatric Association, paedophilia or paedophilic disorder (defined as recurrent feelings of intense sexual arousal, fantasies, sexual urges or behaviours around sexual activity with a prepubescent child or children, usually under the age of 14) is a psychosexual disorder.
It is one of the paraphilic disorders recognised in DSM-5. And for a person to be diagnosed with paedophilic disorder, the individual must be at least 16 years old and at least five years older than the child or children in the affected individual’s sexual fantasies.
There are two typologies, explains Dr Ujjwal. “Those who are attracted to prepubescent children, mostly below 10 years of age – this is called paedophilia. When an individual has persistent sexual interest in children who are in their teenage, from the age of 11, it is hebephilia.”
A person who has these disorders can be diagnosed by a professional who is trained in sexual medicine and psychology. The disorder is manageable with psychotherapy, adds Dr Ujjwal.
Dr Ujjwal, who has treated some individuals with these disorders, asserts that sexual attraction towards children cannot be justified. That being said, persons who experience these feelings should be encouraged to seek help. “The diagnosis is not the individual’s fault – it is something that is not in their control. However, their behaviour and management of impulses is,” she says.
Dr Shaibya Saldanha, co-founder of Enfold Trust, an NGO that works with children and adults to address gender and sexuality and also supports survivors of child sexual abuse, says, “Sexual feelings are not always controllable, they do arise. They may not follow socio-cultural norms. However, what makes a difference is what action you take. And those actions, when seen from perspectives of human rights and respecting boundaries, make the difference between a human being and degenerate.”
Both Dr Ujjwal and Dr Shaibya say that the stigma against coming forward to acknowledge sexual arousal or attraction towards children should be addressed and adults experiencing the same should be encouraged to come forward and seek help. Both say these feelings cannot be justified. “There is no question of normalising feelings towards children, or actions, that put a child in harm’s way,” maintains Dr Shaibya.
Dr Ujjwal makes an important distinction too – not all those who commit sexual crimes against children have paedophilic disorder. And not all those living with paedophilic disorder will sexually assault or abuse children. “Sexual crimes like rape are often committed to assert power and subdue, which won’t necessarily mean that the person committing these crimes was always attracted to children sexually.”
Addressing stigma around paedophilic disorder and hebephilia is even more important now because of the prevalence of child sexual abuse material (CSAM, also referred to as child pornography) online, which caters to those having feelings of sexual arousal towards children, Dr Shaibya points out. Several studies and research have shown that it is rampant on social media, including platforms like WhatsApp and Telegram, though the companies say they have taken steps to remove groups that disseminate and demand such media. “There are initiatives like Stop It Now in the UK, where a person who is having feelings associated with attraction towards children can call, and ask for help. Such initiatives could be started in India,” Dr Shaibya says.
In India, the Protection of Children from Sexual Offences (POCSO) Act does not recognise children’s sexuality – a criticism that has often come up for the law. This means that teenagers who end up in romantic relationships and engage in sexual activity often find themselves criminalised under the Act if discovered or reported, especially if the boy is just above 18 and the girl’s family files a complaint. It is important to remember here the specification of an adult being at least five years older than the child in their sexual fantasies, as a characteristic of them having paedophilic disorder.
The law does not say anything about criminalising someone talking about experiencing sexual arousal for a child.
However, J Sandhya, a child and women rights activist and a former Child Rights Commission member, argues that POCSO should include a provision to take action against people who promote child sexual abuse. "Only abetment and attempts are considered offences. But in such cases, an act of sexual abuse should have taken place,” she says.
Referring to the instances of certain person justifying such feelings in Kerala’s social media circles, J Sandhya says that if there was such a provision, these comments could be interpreted to say they are justifying child sexual abuse.
“Earlier when the same discussion arose, there were some people who asked if a child’s consent is taken before sending the child to school. These were the inane justifications,” she points out.
Swagata Raha, Head, Restorative Practices, Enfold Trust, says we should also consider what research says, and what our response should be to persons who exhibit signs of paedophilic disorders. “We should think more holistically in terms of response, not necessarily criminalisation. Should there be treatment programs to help such persons manage their behaviour? These are the lines we should think along.”