A recent survey conducted by Allo Health, a sexual health clinic, revealed that 57.32% Indians rely on pornography for sex education, while 65.42% rely on social media. The survey, which involved 8,625 participants across 530 Indian cities, also noted that 59.77% respondents depend on their friends and peers for sex-related information, while a mere 7.93% rely on their parents for sex education. In the absence of comprehensive sexuality education in the country, these figures are concerning.
Activists and sexuality educators draw attention to why such dependence on pornography is worrisome — pornography can create a stilted image of sex, especially among the younger generation, and can perpetuate harmful stereotypes about women, which could lead to abuse.
Niharika Beeja Pradaush, a sexuality educator at the Sex Education Kerala Foundation, spoke on how pornography is intended for self-pleasure or as an aid during sex, and not for education. She said, “Most often, pornography portrays women as submissive. Some of it even portrays sex to be abusive towards women. In a country like India, where a large population of women are victims of domestic violence and sexual abuse, consuming such content can result in harm. Learning about sex from pornography can impact how women are treated in relationships and marriages, especially arranged marriages.”
Vidya Reddy, co-founder of Tulir Centre for the Prevention and Healing of Child Sexual Abuse, said that pornography is contrived and unrealistic, which makes it a harmful source for sexuality education. She said, “Pornography is devoid of intimacy, which is an important part of healthy sexual relationships. It can give people wrong notions about sexual relationships. The solution to this would not be to ban pornography, but to help people, especially adolescents, understand it. This would entail educating them about pornography, how the industry operates, and why it is unrealistic.”
Commenting on how only 7.93% of people get their knowledge of sexuality from parents and guardians, Vidya said that this low figure indicates the failure of Indian parents in performing their duties. She said, “Being a parent means taking on duties that may be perceived as uncomfortable, like educating children about sexuality. When adults abdicate their duty, it is no surprise that adolescents turn to sources like pornography for information.”
Dr Sangeeta Saksena, gynaecologist and co-founder of Enfold Proactive Health Trust, an NGO that imparts sexuality education, concurred. To her, it does not come as a surprise that a large section of the population depends on pornography for sex education, as parents generally avoid talking about such topics with their children. She added, “Now that people, including adolescents, have access to the internet, they often turn to social media or porn to learn about sex. This is harmful and is a result of adolescents being denied rational, value-based, and scientific sexuality education.”
Pornography promotes unrealistic expectations of sex
The survey by Allo Health noted that at least 65% respondents said that their expectations of sex were influenced by pornography. Once again, this is harmful as the pornography industry is male-dominated for the most part and largely appeals to the male gaze. Most pornographic content demeans women and objectifies them, rather than focusing on their satisfaction and pleasure as well.
When asked how such unfair expectations can be remedied, Niharika said that communication between partners before indulging in sex is key. She said, “Partners should clearly communicate their likes and dislikes. They must explicitly talk about their desires and what their expectations are before indulging in any type of sexual activity. Partners can explore what works for them but the key is honest and respectful communication.” However, Niharika also acknowledged that such free and open communication might not often be possible in the Indian context, as sexual desires are generally seen as taboo for women.
Dr Sangeeta also noted that unrealistic expectations of sex developed from consuming porn can be remedied through comprehensive sexuality education. She said, “Sexuality education can emphasise on respect for the body, its functions, and the bodies of others. People also need to be taught that sexual desire is a sensation which can arise from a thought, word, sight, touch, or even a smell. Experiencing a sexual thought is similar to experiencing tastes like sweetness or saltiness. Children and adolescents must not be guilted for experiencing such sensations. The health benefits of sex must also be discussed so that these conversations are not centred around procreation.”
The need for comprehensive sexuality education
While activists and sexuality educators agree that the dependence on pornography to gain knowledge about sex is unhealthy, they believe that the remedy is to implement comprehensive sexuality education in educational institutions. According to the United Nations Population Fund, comprehensive sexuality education is age appropriate and scientifically accurate information about human development, anatomy, and reproductive health. This also includes information about contraception, childbirth, and sexually transmitted diseases.
World Health Organisation guidelines say that age appropriate sexuality education can be provided to children from the age of five onwards. However, 48.02% of those surveyed by Allo Health said that sexuality education must not commence before the age 10. The survey said, “Despite concerns that this approach may be misconstrued as encouraging young children to discuss explicit sexual matters, the reality is that comprehensive sexuality education for young children primarily covers essential topics such as understanding body anatomy, distinguishing between good and bad touch, and promoting consent. These topics help establish a healthy foundation for their future understanding of sexuality.”
Niharika said that age appropriate sexuality education must be provided to people of all ages in order to bring down dependence on pornography for knowledge. “We are a large population and it is not just children who are dependent on pornography for knowledge. I believe that sex education must extend to adolescents, young adults, and middle-aged people. It is not enough if a few NGOs alone take this initiative. Instead, it must come from the government and individuals as well.”
Meanwhile, Vidya pointed out a larger problem around introducing comprehensive sexuality education. She said, “How many parents of adolescents will be okay with their children being taught about sex? This is also an abdication of their duties by parents. The government might have sexuality education programmes in paper, but the real question is whether they are being implemented.”