“I am so gay today (literally and figuratively) as I am no longer a criminal,” began Arnab Nandy, in a Facebook post on September 6, the day when the Supreme Court read down section 377 which criminalised 'unnatural sex' and was used to target LGBTQI communities.
Arnab, who lists photography and photorealistic sketching among his interests in his Facebook profile, penned an emotional and personal post about his journey to accepting his sexuality. But what is most heartwarming about the post is his parents’ reaction, and how they celebrated the verdict along with their son.
Arnab begins by saying that two years ago, he didn’t feel free. He started his journey of self exploration and finally came out to his friend Nikhil on his birthday. “My life changed at that very moment. It felt as if a butterfly coming out of a cocoon. (sic)” he wrote.
He started coming out to his college friends, and finally to his parents. However, he kept his sexuality a secret he shared only with a trusted few, for he did not want his parents to suffer because of the conservative society around them.
He also mentions that while his parents' reaction was not negative, there were doubts if it was because he had some “biological problems” like impotency or erectile dysfunction. “They needed time and thus I waited to not come out in public to protect them,” Arnab says.
However, the day of the verdict, when he came home, his parents gave him a hug and said, “Congratulations son, now it’s legal.” “I couldn't help but let out tears of joy,” Arnab narrates. “I learnt that my mother started sensitizing the folks around her. My Dad is a govt employee and this law was holding him back to fight for me in the fear of what such laws create in the mind of our parents,” he adds.
His mother was so happy that she told him “Now go, broadcast it!” The couple was also happy that they would not get alliances of women for Arnab anymore. “She is my Gem. from not knowing anything about LGBT to becoming a person sensitizing people around her, I am proud of her,” Arnab write about his mother.
He then talks about the importance of spreading awareness which should be the next step, and adds that we have a long way to go. “I hope to see Queer folks not trying to fit into heteronormativity and cherishing what they really are. We are not asking for sympathy but a safe and friendly place to live in harmony. Our lack of awareness, our assumptions, ignorance and phobias are killing our closeted friends. Let's get to know about the LGBTQ community so that's we don't unintentionally be insensitive to our dear friends,” he urges.
Arnab also thanked his friends who made him realise he was more than just their “gay friend”. He went on to share his contacts, in case anyone from the queer community wanted to talk and reach out to someone.
Read his full post here.